Sunday, July 18, 2004band
something to think about.
first band concert: 18th july 2002.
last band concert: 18th july 2004.
this day will always mean something to me. we started our chain of performances on the 18th of july 2002. nervously we took to the stage. the first time for many of us. concert in vch. our very first. went through so much to make it a success. i remember. we sang. japanese songs. and 'if we hold on together'. i remember that feeling of euphoria. it was marvelous. our first concert. a huge success. and i was proud. proud to be a part of the band. a part of a large family that would stick together no matter what.
and today. 18th july 2004. our last performance with this huge group i have come to know and love. i can't help feeling a little sad. a little lost. a little.. something. a meaningful day. our last day. 18th july 2004. we end our life or performances with the tkgssb. two whole years. we deserve to end it with a band. i can see tears. they cloud my vision. how fitting. and how ironic. that today. this day two years ago when everything started. should be the day when everything ends.
everything.
i'll miss my juniors. i won't be able to joke with them on a regular basis anymore. no more seeing all the girls rush to fill the band room. no more scurry of instruments. no more listening to other sections play. no more tuning with the band. no more.. a lot of things.
no more sitting next to christabel and huiping. no more heidi at my back. no more geraldine-and-heidi piano duets. no more laughter and screams from the clarinet section area. no more hurrying the percussionists to keep. no more playing together. the most fun times. i reckon. are when you're with your section. no more quarreling with fang xian over the section. no more listening to candice and huiping crack jokes. no more wacthing wee ling dream. no more listening to yana try and get some stuff right. no more watching fang fall into candice's jokes. no more watching mag trying to stifle her laughter. no more laughing at fang. no more little laura wondering what we're up to. no more huiping bugging me about little-known and useless matters. no more having to teach them. no more being in charge. no more.. too many things.
no more having the band playing a song together on impulse. no more playing to the percussion's beat. no more sections coming in one by one. no more joining in the songs. all these times. i'll miss them. who wouldn't? no more listing to the lively chatter as we await ms sia. no more random notes and clashes as each plays what they want. no more having ms sia drill us in our intonation. scales. tuning. no more.. everything.
no more going home with christabel and chermaine. no more teasing christabel. no more having chermaine to joke with. no more.. nothing.
no more first suite. no more sea treaders. no more el golpe. no more songs of sailor and sea. no more pomp and circumstance. no more playing for national day. no more playing for speech day. no more racing to the foyer for practices. no more rushing to get into position early in the morning. no more having joycelyn conduct. no more hearing the bass drum beat to cut us off. no more.. band.
hurts. too much.
i love the band. i wish i could stay. but now. i have to take my place in the cycle. and it's my turn to leave.
let my heart heal. i need to know. that this is not the end. but it is. and my heart breaks. so now. let it heal. and i'll be back again. someday.
* s w e e t heart`x @ [[11:08 AM]]